Tag Archives: relationships

Not fun on the short end, eh?

For the life of me I can never understand double standards and how people think they can get away with them.

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Filed under Relationships...mmm kinda sorta, This is our blog and we can write what we want

The life of a main bytch

I wish I could have found one that looked more like me. *shrugs*

 

Now if you read, and read well, you know that in my previous post here on FI, I don’t condone cheating. But I do acknowledge it. As contradictory as that may seem……. well not a single fcuk is given on what people think of me on certain issues. This is one.

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Why Relationships don’t last

I am not of any kind of relationship expert… obviously since I can’t find a man… well let me take that back, since I can’t find anyone worthy of my 100% attention. Plenty of men, but I have ADHD and some serious detective skills that always lead to demise of my relationships. And it don’t even be like I am looking for shyt, but especially if we share DNA (sex, for the dummies) I am going to know who else you are fuxing, how often, and when the next time you expecting it. I am a firm co-signer in that saying that women can cheat “better” than men. Yes thee fcuk we can!  Chile…. I can write for days on how many times I have caught my supposedly significant other doing EVERY DAMN THING but what he was supposed to be doing when I wasn’t around and his abundant dehydrated and lackluster in appearance female friends was amuck.

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Baby you look good. Now go take that off

Young Chaka Kahn

I’ve thought this many times.  My absolutely stunning drop dead gorgeous girlfriend and I are getting prepared to go out. I get dressed super fast because I really have nothing more “dress casual” than a pair of jeans and polo shirt.  I have a sports coat I used to wear with my jeans and polo shirt ensemble, but every year that sports coat gets smaller and smaller. Go figure. I think it was made in China so you know all the problem they have with their quality controls over there. The coat is most likely defective.  Back to my story though, I can be dressed and she is still applying makeup.  Then she walks out the bathroom and asks “How do I look?”.   Continue reading

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What Chili wants doesn’t matter- The plight of a regular guy that has to deal with the “female list”

Chili Will Probably Die Old & Lonely

Recently, I heard Chili (1/3 of the R&B Group TLC)  and newly found reality star of VH1’s “What Chili Wants”, on the Steve Harvey Morning Show.  Chili was talking about the upcoming season of “What Chili Wants” and it left me sitting by my radio asking “Why in the world would VH1 do a second season of this show?”  Then, just a few minutes later I realized that this is the same network that will milk the life out of a piece of another show….turning it into 3 more series of reality shows. (Case in point, Flavor of Love-all three seasons, followed by Strange Love with Flavor Flav, followed by I Love New York, followed by I Love New York 2, followed by a Real Chance at Love with Real and Chance followed by Real Chance at Love 2…….see my pattern?)

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Filed under Celebrity News, Coitus Relations, Relationships...mmm kinda sorta

When Your Partner’s Ex Looks Better Than You

Hello Ladies

It is one of the worst things to find out about your current relationship.  You see an old picture of the two of them together, or you find an old Valentine’s Day card he sent to her or………..they are still friends on Facebook.  You find out his name and pull up his page.  The profile loads and you find yourself in a moment where the only thing that really fits the situation is “Damn”.  It happens. Life happens.  Shyt happens.  And at this point you just have to make sure the shyt doesn’t hit the fan.  Because when shyt hits the fan it splatters and it takes a lot of Pine Sol to clean up.  Cleaning up shyt is rarely pleasant. Obviously, finding out your girlfriend use to get tossed up by the Old Spice Guy (before he was the Old Spice Guy) can be very intimidating.  How you handle this situation going forward can and will affect you and your relationship.

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Filed under Coitus Relations, Relationships...mmm kinda sorta, You Care

When your relevancy dwindles

Yesterday was Valentine’s day right? Well if you are in relationship, I would hope that if you celebrated it with your S/O, you shared gifts of the like. If not… oh well. But what happens when you ARE in a ‘ship (plantonic, romantic, cut buddies…etc) and there are certain “expectations” and you/him/her don’t fulfill them?
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The Best and Worst Boobs Ever

Salma Hayek- Honorable Mention

Actually, these are only the best and worst boobs I found in one hour.  Let me explain.

Breasts are defined as:   Either of the pair of mammae (pronounced ma’am mae) occurring on the chest in humans and having a discrete areola around the nipple,especially the mammae of the female after puberty, which are enlarged and softened by hormonally influenced mammary-gland development and fat deposition and which secrete milk after the birth of a child. (Sexy right?)
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Filed under Celebrity News, This is our blog and we can write what we want

Big Sexy’s Guide For Women To Meet Practical Men

I AM LEGEND

Ladies, let’s face it. Meeting a decent guy is hard. Off the top of your head, where is the first place you would go if you want to meet a guy? You said the club didn’t you? I know you did. Well you are not alone. Thousands of women everyday would answer that question the same way you did. What is the problem with meeting guys in the club? Well nothing really. Clubs are meant for people to go and have a good time, hangout and meet others. Problem is a club is a “casual hookup spot” for most guys. And when I say “casual hookup spot” what I really mean is a club is conducive to facilitating the sexual interactions with women we are not in a relationship with whereby we can take you home (or to the car) and proceed to give you the best three minutes of steamy hot sex and the introduction of the Birmingham Booty Call.

Conversely, most women go to the club (as you have already said) to meet guys. Guys come to the club to try and sleep with you, women come to the club to meet with you. Do you see the how this is a problem? The expectation from each side is wrong from the start.
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You catch more flies with honey than you do with shyt

Is what my father used to say to me in situations where kindness is needed instead of retaliation.  I remember one time I told him….”Dad, you’re right about the honey but you can still catch a nice bit of flies with that shyt!”  My father erupted in laughter and had to agree.  What I took from that is……sometimes you will be in situations where you need not apply honey but a pile of shyt is called for. I found out some information today where a heaping pile of shyt is called for instead of the pureness of honey. Besides, I’ve been using honey for the last couple of years regarding this and apparently it didn’t matter. I had some information about a bitter stankin ex come to my attention today and I just want to vent about it.  I realize that there must be thousands more of these bitter stankin women out there and so I’m not going to totally single out my ex, so for the purpose of the rest of this blog, when I refer to this bitter spiteful b*tch….I’m also referring to her and all of the other stanking bitter b*tches that need be addressed.  (Can you tell I was hot when I wrote this?)

My ex is one sour miserable bitter b*tch.  And I have an excellent record of never calling a woman a b*tch (to her face).  Seriously, for me calling a woman a b*tch is a tabu issue.  For me, calling a woman a b*tch is the same as a white person calling me a nigger…….or just as tabu as me calling a woman a worthless cunt (why do yall hate that so much anyway?). Fact of the matter is I don’t like that word…….but….. this……. b*tch.

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